Dear Blushing Bride,
You are preparing for one of the biggest days of your life. When it comes to a happy marriage – you want all the details on your fiance…beforehand. Take note of these 10 questions you must ask your fiance before the big day…and big life.
What’s really going on in his head? What expectations does he have about your marriage? Don’t be afraid to ask your fiance these questions…
Question #2: How much money do we earn together? Now? In one year? In five years? Ten?
Question #3: What is our ultimate financial goal regarding annual income, and when do we anticipate achieving it? By what means, and through what efforts?
Question #4: How much time will each of us spend at work, and during what hours? Do we begin work early? Will we prefer to work into the evening?
Question #5: Do we eat meals together? Which ones? Who is responsible for the food shopping? Who prepares the meals? Who cleans up afterward?
Question #6: Is each of us happy with the other’s approach to health? Does one have habits or tendencies that concern the other (e.g., smoking, excessive dieting, poor diet)?
Question #7: What place does the other’s family play in our family life? How often do we visit or socialize together?
Question #8: Will we have children? If so, when? How many? How important is having children to each of us? How will having a child change the way we live now? Will we want to take time off from work, or work a reduced schedule? For how long? Will we need to rethink who is responsible for housekeeping?
Question #9: What are my partner’s needs for cultivating or maintaining friendships outside our relationship? Is it easy for me to support those needs, or do they bother me in any way?
Question #10: Do we share a religion or faith? Do we belong to a church, synagogue, mosque or temple? More than one? If not, would our relationship benefit from such an affiliation?
ACTION STEP: Nominate 1-2 hours over the next 2 weeks to sit down and ask your fiance these vital questions to ensure you’re both on the same page before getting hitched. One fantastic program that helped my husband and I get fully ready for marriage was Prepare. During Prepare you complete an online survey then get to meet with a facilitator to discuss your positioning on certain topics and values that affect marriage like cultural/ethnic issues, religion, parenting issues, cohabitation issues, forgiveness issues, commitment issues and issues arising from a previous marriage. I highly recommend. Check out Prepare to locate your closest facilitator.